Date:- 30th June 2009
Time:- Between 9 and 10 p.m
Sameer was seated on the comfortable red bean bag neatly placed upon the corner to the right of the entry to the room. As smoke swirled over him, seducing his frenzied mind with various evocative images, he could but manage half a smile.
On the bed lied Assad, a dark skinned muscular youth, heaving breathes out of his pouted lips. Sameer could not help notice the perfection of his body. Every part having only as much fat as one can live with. Every muscle well toned. His hairless chest with its two dark pointy nipples rising and ebbing calmly. The calm hid the energy, the passion and the animal like strength within it. His eyes slowly turned to his own arms and his hairy body. He ran his finger between the valley that his man-boobs had carved and over the hillock that was his ever expanding belly. 'Such a strange combination', he thought.
As he smoked his Benson & Hedges, his eyes followed the darkness around him- a shabby little room in the congested Zakir Hussain nagar of Okhla. One bed to the left of the entrance, currently occupied.One table covered with a black table cloth with a jute pen stand perched upon it, just opposite to the bed so that the gap between the two served as a passage for visitors. A table lamp on the far right corner, deservedly so as it had long finished its utility. It owed its existence, as many of us do, to sentiments alone. Just beside this lamp, Sameer was seated. Nothing more.
Exhausting his cigarette, Sameer slid in beside Assad. Assad always had a calming effect him. Within, his little self would leap and soak in ecstasy. Without, his normal tense self would float around with a new found buoyancy. He glanced at his watch - 9:45 already. He had to leave within an hour.
He let his round fingers roam freely on the huge playground that was Assad's bare back. His digits moved around covering every inch of the known territory. It was like playing the piano. Only more exciting. Slowly, his right hand made its way through the cavern of Assad's armpit into the hard muscles of his chest. It felt like a freshly mowed garden. Meanwhile his left hand had, own its own accord, gone on to caress Assad's silky black hair. As it sifted through the grasslands, he could feel the sweat, like dew drops, upon the palm of his hand. This hand finally rested upon the crease of Assad's forehead, its fingers dangling over the crescent eyes. Like a charmed snake, the forefinger of his right hand started making circles over Assad's pretty dark nipple. Spiraling in, he could feel the excitement akin to a child discovering a new plaything. It was not new to him, but it always felt new to him.
Assad was aroused by this action. Flinging Sameer's arm aside he cried - 'C'mon. Take a break.'
There's was not a God sent pair. Assad, a hefty Muslim, resident of Delhi from many generations, was an unskilled machine operator in a factory which produced Motors. He no longer spoke to his family. He had become an outcast 8 years back when he realized he was different. He could not let his family face it so he ran away. Now he lived in this tiny room in Okhla that he called home. Sameer, a second generation migrated into Delhi Punjabi was unlike other Punjabis a bit bulky. But the sweet smile more than made up for that. He was a student at Delhi University pursuing History. Assad was seven years elder to him. But he never felt that way. Indeed, he did not even think of Assad as different from him. Sameer, Assad, Assad, Sammer ... they were all the same. When he looked at Assad, he did not see Assad, but saw his own self reflected. Maybe that is called love.
But there's was a love scorned by society. There's was a love that was shared within the walls of the room, hidden, hideous like a monster. There's was a love that no one could understand, no one could feel and no one could accept. There's was a love shrouded with fear and insecurity. Yet, it was the love of a child. The playful engagements of two lovely,lonely souls. It was a love that melted the physical boundaries of the body and entwined the soul into a singularity. There love was beyond this world.
Assad was now up. He looked up at Sameer and felt a sense of gratitude towards God.
"You know what date it is, Sam? "
"Yeah. June the 30th. What's with that ?" replied sameer, who was busy trying to light another cigarette.
"2 more days, pyaare. 2 more days and we shall be out of this disgusting existence", Assad replied dreamily.
"You mean the verdict ?" Sameer was now cursing the lighter at the top of his voice-"Bloody sister - fucker, why won't you light, you slut !"
"Yes. The verdict. Imagine, two days and we can then walk hand in hand in the streets of Delhi. Two days and we can live like Normal beings. A normal Life, do you understand that Sameer ?", asked Assad.
"Oh Fuck I do. Yes! see the bitch is alight now", sameer replied indifferently.
"A life where we need not hide, need not fear, need not face the world with bowed heads. Hell! I might even get a better job, what do you think ?", Assad rose to wear his T-shirt. "Are you even listening, Asshole ?", he added.
"No don't that", sameer said sharply.
"Don't do what", demanded Assad with his hands on his hips.
"Don't wear that T-shirt. I prefer you otherwise. You are such a beauty. Why hide it?", retorted Sameer.
"Okay, baba, whatever you say", and added "Say Sammy boy, when the verdict comes, we will have a party. We'll go to the best Discotheque in Delhi and if they stop us we'll tell them to go fuck themselves. We'll have the time of our life man. I can't even wait for it."
"Well, you've got to, you know. Can you think of the number of people who are working their ass off so that this thing is not passed ? And its a court, remember. And in India. We might as well become old and still be waiting for the party to begin", Sameer replied haughtily.
"You're very negative man. Think well. Always", Assad replied, as he took the cigarette from Sameer's nicotine stained fingers. He rarely smoked. Today was one such occasion.
"How about a quickie Old boy", said sameer, always ready for action.
"No Fatso. I need to get up early tomorrow. And you better be leaving. Its 10:30 and you won't get the bus.", replied Assad, adding- "Besides I also need to sleep now."
Sameer looked towards the door and sighed. The long journey home. The constant questioning of his family members. The beating and insults of his father. The tears of his mother wiped by her 'dupatta'. The ridicule of his neighbors and the silence of everyone around him. It was the kind of treatment that AIDS patient in India got a few years back ( and even do). "I donot have a fucking disease.", he often thought, but feared to speak aloud.
Sameer got up and looked around. "Fuck my fate", he said, as Assad started guffawing, "Who would fuck a fucked up filthy mess ?", he said as he punched Sameer on his tummy. Sameer had a grin on his face. He hugged Assad and turned to leave.
"Be careful and take care" were the last words of Assad as he closed the door and the sound of closing of latches reached Sameer's ear. Sameer started climbing down the stairs, counting 161 of them as he reached the narrow lanes of Zakir hussain Nagar.
Though he was skeptic, his mind was full of activity. Full of thoughts about the verdict and what it would mean for him and Assad. Of how it would give them a place in the world and an identity to put a finger on. Of how it would give them confidence and bring others like them together to form a community. Of how it would make them human and --
"There is the mother fucking eunuch", came a splitting voice "Saala Naamard filth dirt vermin come here to defile our homes. Look at him fellows, he not even human - a disease a rot don't go too near him lest he latch on to you and castrate you." It was a voice full of hatred and also stank of country liquor. There were about 5 other with him, all eating out of his hand. Sameer was used to all this nuisance.
"This mother fucker will now live with us and eat with us with his head held high. Seeing us in our bloody eyes", he said "Thoo", he spat at Sameer. "With what the world has come to, it is for us to rid our society of this offshoot, this disgusting excuse of a human.", he said frothing with anger as he took a step towards Sameer. The six of them were now blocking Sameer's path so that he was forced to listen to all this.
Assad was listening to evrything from his room. He too was used to it. But somehow it did not feel very right today. He hesitated first and then opened the door and shouted to Sameer - "Hey! Should I come ?"
"No. It's all right. These illegitimate sons of bitches can do me nothing", shot Sameer at the top of his voice.
The drunkard charged at him and with a swift blow, while Sameer was looking towards Assad, drove a clutch knife between his ribs while he spat at his face and the rest packed punches and kicked him as hard as they could. Hearing Sameer's shriek, Assad rushed down the stairs and hearing him approach, the hooligans fled the scene.
"Fuckers. I won't leave them alive", Assad shouted at the top of his voice, his eyes bloodshed and his arms shaking violently with anger. But he took Sameer into his arms with a caress and evaluated the injury. He needed a hospital. Or the blood loss could be fatal. Assad was hoping that the knife had not punctured Sameer's lungs, as he pulled him over to the pavement and asking Sameer to stay awhile, ran to get an auto.
Sameer was lying with a blank stare at the sky. There was no star. No hope. Just darkness. Only a while back he was so hopeful and gay. And now he lay distraught and stabbed. This was the reality. This was his and Assad's and many more like him's reality. Thinking, he closed his now heavy eyes and passed away.
Assad was besides Sameer as they put him on a stretcher and took him to a room. Questions then ensued-
"How did he get hurt ?"
"He was stabbed."
"Have you reported to the Police station ?"
"No....Yes....they know about it.", he lied.
"What was he doing so late out?"
"Just visiting"
"What is he to you ?"
He stopped at that. He had never thought of this. There was no answer to it. "What is he to me?", "What is he to me?", Assad kept asking himself. "What is he?", "There is no he. He is me and I am him. His pain is mine and so is his smile. How could he explain it to the Nurse filling an innocuous looking form. "
As Assad turned to the blood stained stretcher where Sameer lay, a new emotion surged within him - Love and anger and pride and hope in never found proportions. He looked the nurse in the eye and said - "He is my lover. And I, his. That is what we are to each other."
Out of shame or disgust or pity, the nurse looked down on the form and quickly added- "Okay, let's put that down as friend, alright ?"
"Yeah. He's a friend too. But i love him. Please save him Nurse", said Assad, now more confident than ever before. He had nothing to fear. In a society where rapists and murderers and child-molesters and wife- beaters could live with dignity and without a guilt, why could not a lover do so? His sin was so trivial - he saw no boundary in love. A glow came upon his face and pressing Sameers wrist, he said - "We will make it, Dost." And as if to agree, Sameer made a slight motion with his forefinger scratching the thick palm of Assad.
Date:- 2nd July 2009
Time:- 9 am in the morning
Assad brought a beautiful bouquet for Sameer. He was not the romantic sort but today he was happy. Today he could kiss even his enemy.
He went into ward No.212 where Sameer was kept. He had recovered quite rapidly in the past two days. Assad could not see him often as his family members had come on hearing the news. They thought he got into a fight. Assad knew that Sameer would not say otherwise. He was too wise for that.
The sunlight was dancing gayly upon his face and Sameer looked beautiful with his charming smile. Looking at the bouquet, Sameer started laughing - "What's that ? 2 days and you already found some else to cozy up to ?"
"No fool. It's for you. And I would not be with anyone other than you, Fatso", Assad said and added "Listen I have a good news for you. Do you remember the date ?"
Sameer thought for awhile and looked up to Assad in disbelief. His face flushed with excitement and he sprang up like a wily leopard, grabbing Assad by his shoulder, he said with guarded joy, "Is it then ?
We now legally exist ?"
"Yes, my love. We now exist. The high court has passed the verdict in our favor !", Assad replied.
They stood there, arms on each other's shoulder. Feeling the moment. How does it feel to know that you are something ? How does it feel to know that you exist ? How does it feel to know that YOU ARE HUMAN ?
I will never know as well as Sameer and Assad found out at that moment. I will never know how it feels to be born again and remember every second that passes. I will never know how it feels to be in such love !
They are all the same, the tame and the maim
From one they come, to one they go
Yet they hate each other so.
The merging colors of a rainbow,
Bury this hate, and love do sow !
This is my first attempt at a meaningful short story. It also clearly presents my stand on the LGBT issue. Compassion is what we live for, i believe. Nothing less.
Please do let me know if you hate it or like it.
Cheers! :)
Time:- Between 9 and 10 p.m
Sameer was seated on the comfortable red bean bag neatly placed upon the corner to the right of the entry to the room. As smoke swirled over him, seducing his frenzied mind with various evocative images, he could but manage half a smile.
On the bed lied Assad, a dark skinned muscular youth, heaving breathes out of his pouted lips. Sameer could not help notice the perfection of his body. Every part having only as much fat as one can live with. Every muscle well toned. His hairless chest with its two dark pointy nipples rising and ebbing calmly. The calm hid the energy, the passion and the animal like strength within it. His eyes slowly turned to his own arms and his hairy body. He ran his finger between the valley that his man-boobs had carved and over the hillock that was his ever expanding belly. 'Such a strange combination', he thought.
As he smoked his Benson & Hedges, his eyes followed the darkness around him- a shabby little room in the congested Zakir Hussain nagar of Okhla. One bed to the left of the entrance, currently occupied.One table covered with a black table cloth with a jute pen stand perched upon it, just opposite to the bed so that the gap between the two served as a passage for visitors. A table lamp on the far right corner, deservedly so as it had long finished its utility. It owed its existence, as many of us do, to sentiments alone. Just beside this lamp, Sameer was seated. Nothing more.
Exhausting his cigarette, Sameer slid in beside Assad. Assad always had a calming effect him. Within, his little self would leap and soak in ecstasy. Without, his normal tense self would float around with a new found buoyancy. He glanced at his watch - 9:45 already. He had to leave within an hour.
He let his round fingers roam freely on the huge playground that was Assad's bare back. His digits moved around covering every inch of the known territory. It was like playing the piano. Only more exciting. Slowly, his right hand made its way through the cavern of Assad's armpit into the hard muscles of his chest. It felt like a freshly mowed garden. Meanwhile his left hand had, own its own accord, gone on to caress Assad's silky black hair. As it sifted through the grasslands, he could feel the sweat, like dew drops, upon the palm of his hand. This hand finally rested upon the crease of Assad's forehead, its fingers dangling over the crescent eyes. Like a charmed snake, the forefinger of his right hand started making circles over Assad's pretty dark nipple. Spiraling in, he could feel the excitement akin to a child discovering a new plaything. It was not new to him, but it always felt new to him.
Assad was aroused by this action. Flinging Sameer's arm aside he cried - 'C'mon. Take a break.'
There's was not a God sent pair. Assad, a hefty Muslim, resident of Delhi from many generations, was an unskilled machine operator in a factory which produced Motors. He no longer spoke to his family. He had become an outcast 8 years back when he realized he was different. He could not let his family face it so he ran away. Now he lived in this tiny room in Okhla that he called home. Sameer, a second generation migrated into Delhi Punjabi was unlike other Punjabis a bit bulky. But the sweet smile more than made up for that. He was a student at Delhi University pursuing History. Assad was seven years elder to him. But he never felt that way. Indeed, he did not even think of Assad as different from him. Sameer, Assad, Assad, Sammer ... they were all the same. When he looked at Assad, he did not see Assad, but saw his own self reflected. Maybe that is called love.
But there's was a love scorned by society. There's was a love that was shared within the walls of the room, hidden, hideous like a monster. There's was a love that no one could understand, no one could feel and no one could accept. There's was a love shrouded with fear and insecurity. Yet, it was the love of a child. The playful engagements of two lovely,lonely souls. It was a love that melted the physical boundaries of the body and entwined the soul into a singularity. There love was beyond this world.
Assad was now up. He looked up at Sameer and felt a sense of gratitude towards God.
"You know what date it is, Sam? "
"Yeah. June the 30th. What's with that ?" replied sameer, who was busy trying to light another cigarette.
"2 more days, pyaare. 2 more days and we shall be out of this disgusting existence", Assad replied dreamily.
"You mean the verdict ?" Sameer was now cursing the lighter at the top of his voice-"Bloody sister - fucker, why won't you light, you slut !"
"Yes. The verdict. Imagine, two days and we can then walk hand in hand in the streets of Delhi. Two days and we can live like Normal beings. A normal Life, do you understand that Sameer ?", asked Assad.
"Oh Fuck I do. Yes! see the bitch is alight now", sameer replied indifferently.
"A life where we need not hide, need not fear, need not face the world with bowed heads. Hell! I might even get a better job, what do you think ?", Assad rose to wear his T-shirt. "Are you even listening, Asshole ?", he added.
"No don't that", sameer said sharply.
"Don't do what", demanded Assad with his hands on his hips.
"Don't wear that T-shirt. I prefer you otherwise. You are such a beauty. Why hide it?", retorted Sameer.
"Okay, baba, whatever you say", and added "Say Sammy boy, when the verdict comes, we will have a party. We'll go to the best Discotheque in Delhi and if they stop us we'll tell them to go fuck themselves. We'll have the time of our life man. I can't even wait for it."
"Well, you've got to, you know. Can you think of the number of people who are working their ass off so that this thing is not passed ? And its a court, remember. And in India. We might as well become old and still be waiting for the party to begin", Sameer replied haughtily.
"You're very negative man. Think well. Always", Assad replied, as he took the cigarette from Sameer's nicotine stained fingers. He rarely smoked. Today was one such occasion.
"How about a quickie Old boy", said sameer, always ready for action.
"No Fatso. I need to get up early tomorrow. And you better be leaving. Its 10:30 and you won't get the bus.", replied Assad, adding- "Besides I also need to sleep now."
Sameer looked towards the door and sighed. The long journey home. The constant questioning of his family members. The beating and insults of his father. The tears of his mother wiped by her 'dupatta'. The ridicule of his neighbors and the silence of everyone around him. It was the kind of treatment that AIDS patient in India got a few years back ( and even do). "I donot have a fucking disease.", he often thought, but feared to speak aloud.
Sameer got up and looked around. "Fuck my fate", he said, as Assad started guffawing, "Who would fuck a fucked up filthy mess ?", he said as he punched Sameer on his tummy. Sameer had a grin on his face. He hugged Assad and turned to leave.
"Be careful and take care" were the last words of Assad as he closed the door and the sound of closing of latches reached Sameer's ear. Sameer started climbing down the stairs, counting 161 of them as he reached the narrow lanes of Zakir hussain Nagar.
Though he was skeptic, his mind was full of activity. Full of thoughts about the verdict and what it would mean for him and Assad. Of how it would give them a place in the world and an identity to put a finger on. Of how it would give them confidence and bring others like them together to form a community. Of how it would make them human and --
"There is the mother fucking eunuch", came a splitting voice "Saala Naamard filth dirt vermin come here to defile our homes. Look at him fellows, he not even human - a disease a rot don't go too near him lest he latch on to you and castrate you." It was a voice full of hatred and also stank of country liquor. There were about 5 other with him, all eating out of his hand. Sameer was used to all this nuisance.
"This mother fucker will now live with us and eat with us with his head held high. Seeing us in our bloody eyes", he said "Thoo", he spat at Sameer. "With what the world has come to, it is for us to rid our society of this offshoot, this disgusting excuse of a human.", he said frothing with anger as he took a step towards Sameer. The six of them were now blocking Sameer's path so that he was forced to listen to all this.
Assad was listening to evrything from his room. He too was used to it. But somehow it did not feel very right today. He hesitated first and then opened the door and shouted to Sameer - "Hey! Should I come ?"
"No. It's all right. These illegitimate sons of bitches can do me nothing", shot Sameer at the top of his voice.
The drunkard charged at him and with a swift blow, while Sameer was looking towards Assad, drove a clutch knife between his ribs while he spat at his face and the rest packed punches and kicked him as hard as they could. Hearing Sameer's shriek, Assad rushed down the stairs and hearing him approach, the hooligans fled the scene.
"Fuckers. I won't leave them alive", Assad shouted at the top of his voice, his eyes bloodshed and his arms shaking violently with anger. But he took Sameer into his arms with a caress and evaluated the injury. He needed a hospital. Or the blood loss could be fatal. Assad was hoping that the knife had not punctured Sameer's lungs, as he pulled him over to the pavement and asking Sameer to stay awhile, ran to get an auto.
Sameer was lying with a blank stare at the sky. There was no star. No hope. Just darkness. Only a while back he was so hopeful and gay. And now he lay distraught and stabbed. This was the reality. This was his and Assad's and many more like him's reality. Thinking, he closed his now heavy eyes and passed away.
Assad was besides Sameer as they put him on a stretcher and took him to a room. Questions then ensued-
"How did he get hurt ?"
"He was stabbed."
"Have you reported to the Police station ?"
"No....Yes....they know about it.", he lied.
"What was he doing so late out?"
"Just visiting"
"What is he to you ?"
He stopped at that. He had never thought of this. There was no answer to it. "What is he to me?", "What is he to me?", Assad kept asking himself. "What is he?", "There is no he. He is me and I am him. His pain is mine and so is his smile. How could he explain it to the Nurse filling an innocuous looking form. "
As Assad turned to the blood stained stretcher where Sameer lay, a new emotion surged within him - Love and anger and pride and hope in never found proportions. He looked the nurse in the eye and said - "He is my lover. And I, his. That is what we are to each other."
Out of shame or disgust or pity, the nurse looked down on the form and quickly added- "Okay, let's put that down as friend, alright ?"
"Yeah. He's a friend too. But i love him. Please save him Nurse", said Assad, now more confident than ever before. He had nothing to fear. In a society where rapists and murderers and child-molesters and wife- beaters could live with dignity and without a guilt, why could not a lover do so? His sin was so trivial - he saw no boundary in love. A glow came upon his face and pressing Sameers wrist, he said - "We will make it, Dost." And as if to agree, Sameer made a slight motion with his forefinger scratching the thick palm of Assad.
Date:- 2nd July 2009
Time:- 9 am in the morning
Assad brought a beautiful bouquet for Sameer. He was not the romantic sort but today he was happy. Today he could kiss even his enemy.
He went into ward No.212 where Sameer was kept. He had recovered quite rapidly in the past two days. Assad could not see him often as his family members had come on hearing the news. They thought he got into a fight. Assad knew that Sameer would not say otherwise. He was too wise for that.
The sunlight was dancing gayly upon his face and Sameer looked beautiful with his charming smile. Looking at the bouquet, Sameer started laughing - "What's that ? 2 days and you already found some else to cozy up to ?"
"No fool. It's for you. And I would not be with anyone other than you, Fatso", Assad said and added "Listen I have a good news for you. Do you remember the date ?"
Sameer thought for awhile and looked up to Assad in disbelief. His face flushed with excitement and he sprang up like a wily leopard, grabbing Assad by his shoulder, he said with guarded joy, "Is it then ?
We now legally exist ?"
"Yes, my love. We now exist. The high court has passed the verdict in our favor !", Assad replied.
They stood there, arms on each other's shoulder. Feeling the moment. How does it feel to know that you are something ? How does it feel to know that you exist ? How does it feel to know that YOU ARE HUMAN ?
I will never know as well as Sameer and Assad found out at that moment. I will never know how it feels to be born again and remember every second that passes. I will never know how it feels to be in such love !
They are all the same, the tame and the maim
From one they come, to one they go
Yet they hate each other so.
The merging colors of a rainbow,
Bury this hate, and love do sow !
This is my first attempt at a meaningful short story. It also clearly presents my stand on the LGBT issue. Compassion is what we live for, i believe. Nothing less.
Please do let me know if you hate it or like it.
Cheers! :)
WOW what a gripping story
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